Sibe Parting

Below is the parting letter written by Evil Sibe on the 12th November 2001 on alt.fan.furry, it's written during the lawsuit from Rabbit Valley against him and FXC.

Sibe also adresses Nexxus temporarily closing FurNation and how it affected him, he also describes having wanted to start a "napster like thing" for furry art.

Later on he writes "I plan on not using Sibe as anymore of a part of me" and subsequently apologises to all the artists he's hurt.

Sibe continues to apologise for hurting his boyfriend through-ought the letter and finishes off by taking responsibility for all the events that transpired.

The letter was archived as a plain text file around 2004 by an unknown person.

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From: rreddi60@hotmail.com (Sibe 0wns J00)
Newsgroups: alt.fan.furry
Subject: Fur: Sibes last words
Date: 12 Nov 2001 18:46:10 -0800
Organization: http://groups.google.com/
Lines: 89
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Well Ive had it put on the line for me, my boyfriend didnt want to be
dragged into this in the first place.  Hes the best thing I have going
in my life right now, and I would rather do what he says then lose
him.  Initally when I posted the pubs , he told me to never do
anything like that again.  So I went behind his back and did other
stuff, and by the time he had the chance to stop me... nexxus pulled
furnation and was pulling every string he could to get me on the
hitlist of every body he could.  I dont expect to be treated well by
anyone, but I can tell you furs what to expect from Sibes future.  I
kinda thought the way I was goin, the only way I could make a name for
myself in the fandom was to have a "bad boy" image.  It was cool and
everything on yiffnet and all, but I did go too far on this one. 
Pretty much the relationships, meager as they were had dissolved in
the fandom.   Anything meaningful got replaced by where are the files
in my email... I guess thats what I wanted initially...  But Its
hurting more then me, its hurting my boyfriend.  A lot of furs would
think that is great, but please understand he had nothing to do with
this.  He found out after nexxus had totally shut down furnation and
there was a hunt out to see who I really was and to do something about
it.

Weather or not what I did was what I thought was good for the fandom
or not, it truly in the end turned out to be a bad thing.  I had this
idea that I would start up a napster like thing and some artists would
say how cool that was n such... well nothing like that happened.

I really kinda hit a low today, realizing what Ive done and knowing
that I cant really undo it.  I dont care about winning, or one upping
someone else who has hurt me or anything like that.  If I get it in
the end, I probably deserved it.  Im a pretty messed up individual in
the head, a good furiend of mine was in my car when I nearly killed
myself... managed to hit my head pretty hard.   Its messed up my moods
a lot, and I need to get help.  I dont feel it will excuse my actions
at all, however maybe it will explain them.  Im going to try to get
away from irc, newsgroups, all that stuff and just focus on getting my
life back togeather.  Im really sorry to have bothered you people.

In doing this I know it will make those that stood by me through this
mess not talk to me anymore, and to those people I say this... Please
understand that I want nothing but success for my boyfriend... and the
things that I do need to be based on that if I want to continue my
relationship with him, or have anykind of longlasting relationship
with anyone else.   I have been selfish.

To those that called me up on the phone, and those artists that have
said things about me I hope it is some consolation that I plan on not
using Sibe as anymore of a part of me.  I hurt the artist that I love
a lot, and now that I have fully come to the realization of what harm
I have done, I empathize.  Please understand that initially I was too
selfish to see the reprucussions of my actions on those that I love,
now I understand how you artists... and the lovers of you artists
feel.

Ive been lucky, Ive had a lot of furry artists draw my character for
free... doing a lot of fun things.  To you, I feel like a traitor,
just as I do to my boyfriend.

To those furs who seemed to see something better inside of me then
what I showed to the fandom, thanks... Im gonna try to bring that part
more twords the forefront.  I know that Im not a bad guy, I just have
done some bad things.  Ive argued the point about stuff that dosent
make sence just because I felt I had to be right.

I dont know If Ill ever get better, or even If Ill follow through and
not do this stuff... But I know in my heart that I wanted to be a
husky dog that was outgoing and playful, but ended up not showing that
to the world.

I dunno... Im kinda to the point of rambling now so Im gonna say
goodbye and know that when I do get money again Ill try to put more
back into the fandom.  Im a pretty fucked up individual psycologically
Ill admit, and Im gonna get some help with that.   Maybe after some
therapy Ill come out a better person, or at least understand why I try
to make so much pain for myself all the time and push all my furiends
away.

Heh.. ya know the last time I actually cried when posting some
internet stuff was back in 98 when I broke up with EbonFox before I
went out to see another fur in minneapolis.  I know how much of a
dissappointment I was to him, now I fear I have done that to many many
many others that I cant even relate to right now.

Im gonna take responsibility for what happened, and if I need to get
my ass kicked or whatever that takes then thats ok with me.  
Honestly, Im doing a better job at kicking my own ass then any of you
furs who are threating me could ever have...

Sincerely,
Ross Reddick